Hello guys
Oh my Lord, i have a lot of excuses :( First of all, so sorry for the very late post....... Second of all sorry for the English post...... As you all know, we are two bloggers now..... The amazing Arlene and myself...... We write the post biweekly, and this week was my turn.... I have been super busy with some stuff, traveling and lack of sleep...... It all ended up with me being sick and yea..... I haven't been myself lately, which is the reason why I haven't been able to write before now.... Sorry !!
Now the topic for this week is a little part 2 of the post from last week....... So Arlene wrote about the wedding ring and the meaning behind that, Arlene is a Christian girl, so I thought I could write about the Thaali ..... The Mangala Sutra as it's also called in Sanskrit. Mangala means holy or auspicious and sutra means thread. Normally the thali is a Hindu thing, where the groom ties it around the brides neck at the wedding. The ritual is the indication for a Hindu wedding, and it means that now the couple is married.
The original and traditional thali is a thread prepared with turmeric (manjal thool). Nowadays people make the thali is gold, and typically we Tamil people makes a thali the size of the brides age. So if the bride is 21 years old, the thali is 21 pavin. We Tamil people will usually do the "ponn urukkal", which means that the gold from the thali will me melted and the jeweler will then create the thali. The brides family and grooms family will be present at the ponn urukkal. As soon as the ceremony is over, the bride and groom are not allowed to see each other before the wedding day. At the wedding day, the thali will be sent around the hall, to get blessings from everyone attending, and only after that, the brides goes in to change into her Kurai, and thereafter the groom will tie the knot.
The 3 knots symbolize Brahma, Vishnu and Rudhra. The 3 knots symbolize 3 different aspects of a married woman. The first knot represent her obedience to her husband, the second to his parents and the third represent her respect to God. They also say that the three knots represent that 1. The father protect her childhood, 2. The husband protect her youth and 3. The sons protect her in old age. A woman can never be unprotected. In the internet there is so many other reasons for the 3 knots as well, but there is no "right" or "wrong" here. Most often the groom ties the first knot and then his sister (the tholi) ties the remaining 2 knots. When a woman wears the manjal thali, or gold thali, it indicates the woman is now married. The woman wearing the thali does also mean that the husband will be healthy and a good well-being. The thali is always bought by the grooms family {adselite}
The thali has different names and different colors according to the state in india. Our typical Tamil thali is a gold Pillayar thali, if the bride and groom have checked the kurippu or the wedding is arranged. And Amman thali if it is a love marriage and therefor the families decides not to check the kurippu. It often follows with 2 gold coins on each side of the thali.
They say that the thali will regulize the womans blood circulation. They say it will have the ability to control the level of pressure in a woman's body. This is why they say the the woman has to wear the thali all the time, by touching the body.
Nowadays our Tamil people wear very heavy gold thali, and therefore they put the thali in the bank of together with all their other gold. Most often they only use it at functions and stuff, and now they don't even use the real thali, but a imitation look alike in stead.
I know several couple who do not even have a thali anymore, and only change rings. although the thali actually has a nice meaning and symbolic.
Until next time
Hallo ihr Lieben,
Ich hoffe ihr hattet eine erfolgreiche Woche!
Im heutigen Blog geht es um eine der wichtigsten Dinge, die bei einer Hochzeit nicht fehlen dürfen. Die Eheringe! Aber habt ihr euch jemals gefragt, woher diese Tradition kommt? Oder was es eigentlich an Bedeutung hat? Ich habe mich mal etwas auf die Suche gemacht, um euch und mir die Fragen zu beantworten :)
Woher kommt der Ehering?
Der Ehering weist eine sehr lange Tradition auf. Damals trugen die Römer und Ägypter schon Ringe, um die Verbundenheit mit ihren Partner zum Ausdruck zu bringen. Allerdings besteht seit dem 13. Jahrhundert im Christentum.
{adselite}
Was bedeutet der Ehering?
Der Ehering an sich symbolisiert die ewige
Liebe und Treue, die man sich mit dem Ja-Wort gegenseitig verspricht. Dabei hat dir runde Form des Ringes eine ganz besondere Bedeutung: der Ring ist in sich geschlossen und hat keinen Anfang und kein Ende. Damit wird die Unendlichkeit symbolisiert. Und zwar die Unendlichkeit, die es auch zwischen den Liebenden geben sollte. Es heißt auch, dass der Ring als Zeichen für ein Versprechen zwischen zwei Menschen stehen kann.
Wo trägt man ihn? Rechts oder links?
Diese Frage wird sehr häufig gestellt und ihr habt es auch bestimmt schon insgeheim gefragt. Wo trägt man den Ehering? Manche sagen rechts... manche links? Was ist den nun richtig?!?
In den meisten Ländern wird er an der linken Hand getragen. Die Römer und die Ägypter, glaubten früher das es so eine Art Venenübergang vom Finger zum Herzen gab. In Europa trägt man den Ring aber traditionsgemäß an der rechten Hand.
Ich selbst finde es ein sehr schönes Symbol, sich gegenseitig Eheringe anzustecken und sich die ewige Liebe und Treue zu schwören, bis zum Ende aller Tage!
Falls ihr Fragen habt, oder Anregungen zu zukünftigen Themen könnt ihr euch immer jederzeit melden.
Ich wünsche euch ein schönes Wochenende bis zum nächsten Mal!
xoxo
Arlene
Hallo liebe Leser,
ich hoffe ihr hattet alle ein tolles Halloween. Diejenigen von euch, die es gefeiert haben :)
Mir selbst wurde es erst dieses Jahr so richtig bewusst, wie bekannt Halloween schon bei uns in Europa geworden ist. Die Kinder lernen schon im Kindergarten oder der Schule über Halloween. Gruselige Kürbisschnitzereien, Halloween Dekorationen überall und nicht zu vergessen natürlich das Halloween inspirierte Essen. Auf Instagram zeigt jeder sein Halloween Make up und teilt es mit seinen Followern. Ich muss gestehen, Halloween ist nicht mein Ding. Vielleicht weil so ein mega hype drum gemacht wird...oder vielleicht, weil ich selbst noch keine Kinder habe und es nicht verstehe, wie sehr es die Kleine erfreut. Auf jeden Fall bin ich froh darüber, dass nicht bei jedem Instagram Login ein Zombie Gesicht auf meinem Display auftaucht ;-)
Eine ganz andere Art von Feier, die z.B auch wir Tamilen gerade gefeiert haben ist Diwali. Darum geht es auch in unserem heutigen Blog. Wieso feiern wir überhaupt Diwali? Wie feiert man eigentlich Diwali?
Diwali, oder von einigen auch Deepavali genannt, gehört zu den Hinduistischen Festen. Es wird aber auch nicht nur von Hindus gefeiert. Ich war vor kurzem in New York, wo ich eine große Diwali Feier am Times Sqaure besuchte. Diwali wurde mittlerweile vom Westen adoptiert, ebenso wie Holi. Holi Festivals gibt’s ja auch überall zur Zeit... auch kombiniert mit dem bekanntem Color Run und vieles mehr. Viele Hindus glauben daran, dass Diwali wegen der Rückkehr Ramas gefeiert wird. Er kehrt nach 14 Jahren Exile zurück nach Ayodha. Andere glauben daran, dass Diwali der Geburt von Lakshmi gewidmet ist. Lakshmi ist die Frau von Vishnu. Das Wort Diwali an sich bedeutet im Sanskrit "Lichterkette". Jedes Jahr feiern wir Diwali an einem anderen Tag, so ist es meistens üblich mit den Hinduistischen Feiertagen. Sie werden nie am gleichen Tag gefeiert. Es richtet sich immer nach dem Hindu Kalender und beginnt immer am 15. Tag des Hindumonats Kartik (Ende Oktober / Anfang November), 20 Jahre nach Dasahra zu Neumond.
Wie feiern wir Diwali und wie feiern die Inder Diwali? {adselite}
Wenn ich an meine Kindheit und an Diwali zurück denke, bekamen wir immer neue Kleidung an Diwali. Meine Mutter verbrachte Stunden in der Küche, um traditionelle, vegetarische Köstlichkeiten zu kochen. Ich erinnere mich auch daran, kleine Päckchen mit Essen und Snacks zu packen und an Bekannte zu verteilen.
Seit dem ich nicht mehr zuhause wohne, feiere ich Diwali nicht mehr so richtig um ehrlich zu sein. Welches sich vielleicht in der Zukunft verändern könnte. Ich gehe aber immer an Diwali shoppen und kaufe mir was schönes. Einfach um Diwali als gute Begründung zu nehmen, um neue Outfits zu kaufen. Vor 2 Jahren war ich über Diwali in London, es war sehr überragend. Überall gab es Lichter, Feuerwerk, Musik und die Atmosphäre war einfach wunderbar!!
Ich werde auf jeden Fall noch einmal nach London fliegen, um Diwali zu feiern.
Für Inder ist Diwali zu vergleichen mit Weihnachten für die Christen.
Es ist ein massives Fest vereint mit vielen Traditionen. Schon sehr früh am morgen stehen die Frauen auf, um die erste Tonlampe anzuzünden. Dazu machen sie die schönsten Kolams vor ihrer Haustür. Meistens bestehen die Kolams aus einer Lotus Blüte. Danach verteilen die Kinder Snacks an ihre Freunde und Familienmitglieder. Im Anschluss gehen alle zusammen zum Tempel in ihren neuen Outfits, um den Gottes Segen zu bekommen. Abends verbringen sie den Tag wieder mit der Familie, essen miteinander und warten bis das Feuerwerk anfängt. Jeder feiert draußen gemeinsam miteinander.
Diwali ist etwas sehr großes für Inder, ich werde auf jeden Fall eines Tages auch nach Indien fliegen über Diwali. Einfach um es einmal direkt vor Ort erlebt zu haben.
Wie habt ihr dieses Jahr Diwali verbracht? Teilt eure (Familien-)Tradition mit uns!
Bis zum nächsten Mal
Hey guys Happy Friday.
First of all, sorry for the English post this week. There has been too much going on lately and for us it was more important to post the blog than post it too late in German. Sorry about that !!
The weather outside is amazing. I simply love autumn and the way all the leafes changes its color. The way the leafes falls down the tree and makes a beautiful layer on the ground. The weather changes, the leafes on the trees changes and soon the year will change as well, and we will write 2017. Everything is In change, our behavior, our lifestyle, the society, but one thing I sadly haven't seen changing is our perception of the term Jaathi, or saathi as we Tamils says.
The caste system is initially a "system" where the Indian Hindus divide the society into different classes. The caste system divides into four main categories - Brahmins, Kshatriyas, Vaishyas and the Shudras. Outside of this Hindu caste system are the achhoots - the Dalits or the untouchables. Facts shows that the caste system was established more than 3000 years ago. The 4 main castes were further divided into about 3,000 castes and 25,000 sub-castes, each based on their specific occupation. At the top of the hierarchy are the Brahmins who were mainly teachers and intellectuals and are believed to have come from Brahma's head. Then we have the Kshatriyas, or the warriors and rulers, supposedly from his arms. The third slot went to the Vaishyas, or the traders, who were created from his thighs. At the bottom of the heap were the Shudras, who came from Brahma's feet and did all the menial jobs. If you are born into a caste, you will never change to anything "higher" but most often only get "lower" by marrying into another caste then the one you were born into. (www.bbc.com)
Anyways I am not quite sure about all these "rules and regulations". There was a time in my younger age where my parents explained everything to me, and how everything worked. But to be honest, as I grew up, and I expanded my knowledge and was more capable of thinking for myself I started to ignore this topic more and more. First of all, because it does not make sense to me at all, and because the society, specially our generation has changed a lot already, and we actually do not care about it anymore....... Well well well...... That's a least what I thought....... A while ago I came across a Tamil personality who was sitting at a dining table with a mixed group of people with people from different casts (uuufff I hate to write it like that). We were all having dinner, and everyone brought a dish each and we all shared it. This Tamil personality sat there as well, and suddenly this person says "I would never ever be friend with someone low cast". A awkward silence remained around the table, and this person continues "my parents would kill me if I have friends from lower saathi, they will literally throw me out of the house and abandon me. I could never ever dream about having friends like that, and if I find out later they are not how they said they are, I will cut them out of my life imidiately". People around the table was absolutely in shock. No one knew what to say, but thank god a guy changed the subject and we all started talking about the new subject. I will come back to this individual afterwards.
Another episode I had in my recent years, was a wedding where the casts were mixed. There were literally guests who did not eat at the wedding, because they didn't wanted to eat, what if the food was prepared by the other family. I was like, "why the f*** do you even show up?" Thank god, the couple found out this was going on, and the day today, the couple do not speak to any from that group that did not wanted to eat.
Another "friend" of mine who claims to be a "higher" caste, simply do not have friends from other castes than the one he is from. He literally started rumors about the girls and boys from the lower casts just to put them in a bad standing. His sister got married to another casts, but that does not matter, he keeps doing what he does.
Factually they say that the highest casts are the intellectuals. Now my question is, are the once I explained earlier really intellectual individuals. Is that why they react like animals with no brains. In a society in the 21st century where everything has changed, and they still live after this stupid social system some old non intellectuals created 3000 years ago?{adselite}
Back to the person at the dinner table. I recently found out that person is in a relationship with someone who is from a different caste and I honestly got so happy that finally this person actually realized the stupidity of the caste system. As happy I was, I found out that the person had the exact same conversation with a relative of the partner and was having the exact same opinion as around the dinner table. This person has been tricked into/lied about the partners caste. The engagement is in a couple of weeks, and I am (sorry for that) looking forward to see how the person is going to react when the truth is served for this individual.
I am so sorry to display people the way I do. But damn I hate the caste system, and damn I hate that our generation keeps holding to a stupid culture that was created 3000 years ago.
What do you guys think? Is Jaathi someone we should still stick to or should we look at the individuals and their personality and their intellectual characters? Let me know what you guys thinks.
Until next week
Hey guys. Hope everyone out there is feeling great :) Sooooo, you guys might already have guessed what this week’s topic is about. The Great Grand Puberty Ceremony or Samathiya Veeda as we all call it. When a Hindu girl starts to menstruate, she will be thrown a great grand function. The function will be held by her family, and the family will invite everyone they know. This is actually not only a Hindu festival but they also have these kind of functions in Japan, Korea, Mayan and among Jewish people.
Now, what is the actual tradition behind the Puberty ceremony? So back in the days, it was a ceremony that informed the surroundings that the girl in the house was now ready to get married, and future potential husbands can now come and ask for the girl. It was only close family who attended the function, which was typically held after the first period has stopped. She would be bathed, dressed up nicely and sit on a chair, and in the meanwhile married, often older people would perform different rituals to the girl. Another theory says this is a ritual to get rid of the “thudakku” so she will live happily in her marriage later in her life. So these rituals were done to do thudakku kalivu. The function is done to make sure she will have a good marriage life later, but also to show her that now she has become a woman and she needs to leave her childhood behind and start to prepare to be a good wife.
Back in the days, the girls got their period when they were between 14 and17, so it would be closer to marriage age, and actually the idea about preparing to be a good wife, makes a little sense. Nowadays the girls start to get their period when they are between 10-12. The reason why is the food we eat, he way we keep us active, and other environmental influences.
The typical Samathiya Veedu we attend here In Europe and Canada are way over the top. It is a function for the parents to show how much love they have for their daughters, and to show how much they can do for her. This is from the fancy amazing invitation cards to inviting more than 1000 guests, invite family, friends, neighbors, youtubers etc. It has become a status symbol, to show everyone what we as parents are capable of. Dance performance, professional video, make up, photo shoot, cake cutting with a gold knife, arriving in a helicopter, expensive gifts to the guests when they leave the function and even big after party including alcohol – The limit is skyhigh. {adselite}
The function now is typically held between 6 months later to up to 1 year after her first period. This time is needed to arrange everything; family from abroad needs to attend, so school holidays, and work holidays has to be matched. Makeup artists, the best videoman and photographer needs to be available, so there is a lot of stuff to prepare before the big grand function.
The events nowadays have been commercialized to an extent where it’s hard to follow. They are so grand and extraordinary that they are almost performed bigger than weddings. I have already seen parents who do not support this function anymore, and instead they will have a big birthday celebration when they are 16. Other kids, including my cousin really wanted the function, so she was held a big grand celebration.
What is the girl, who do not menstruate going to do. It’s a fact that some girls will never be able to menstruate, so will they just get a stamp on their forehead.
I personally would be in a dilemma if I had a girl. Now when I am older and more wise, I would not be happy about throwing a party like this. On the other hand, it’s great and amazing that all the family members will be joined in a function like this. I think it’s difficult, and i think it’s all about how our generation wants to support this kind of functions. Are these functions relevant for the girls? What are your thoughts on this? Will our generation continue perform these events, or will they end with our kids? Let me know your thoughts.
Until next Friday
Vanakkam People…….Hope you liked my previous post. I love the idea, and cannot wait to see the concept be rolled out in the rest of the world, and see how people are going to use it. Anyway, my blogpost for this week is about something completely different….. Have any of you, like me, wondered why a Hindu wedding needs to be on specific auspicious date…. And why it’s not allowed to get married in July? I have often thought about it, because July is for me an amazing month, weather is nice, everyone can easily get holiday from work and school, so travels are easy, but from July 15th to August 15th is a totally forbidden month to get married. I have done my research online and found the following answers.
July 15th to August 15th is called the month “Aadi”. It’s the 4th month in the Tamil calendar. In some regions newly married couple are kept separated in this period as well. The reason for this is (as far as I have read online), in early days it was considered that if a woman gets pregnant in Aadi month, she will deliver the baby in March or April, which are the hottest months. The karthikai Veyil will take place in this period. Pregnant woman will suffer more in the hot weather and the newborn will also suffer in the climate. The pregnant will also face cold during the critical month of her pregnancy (December + January).
In this period also a lot of religious festivals takes place, Aadi Chevvai, Aadi Velli, Aadi Karthigai, Aadi Amavasai, Aadi 18 Perukku, Andal Pooram and Varalakshmi Puja. So when all this festivals takes place, the pregnant woman will not be able to join these festivals as well, which is another reason why the husband and wife are separated. {adselite}
Its not only a wedding that cannot take place in Aadi, but it’s also not considered good to shift to a new house or even buy new clothes. I don’t know how many are actually aware of that, at least I haven’t heard it before Hmmmmm…… we live in a scientific world where we know better than what they knew back then. Even though we live all around the world, and have none of the issues mentioned above, we will keep the tradition. That is one of the things I like about the Hindu and Tamil people. We stick to our traditions, and we keep following them, even though we know it might be nonsense.
Imagine me if I could do not shopping in July, what about all the sales that happens in July. What about Aadi thallupadu in India and Sri Lanka …. That would be hard, so in fact I don’t follow the traditions when it comes to little ego me. Traditions are really good. It’s good to have some “rules and regulations” that we stick to. That is what makes our weddings so beautiful, and entertained, because of traditions. When that is said, I think it’s important that we also sometimes question the traditions, and try to understand the meaning behind our traditions. Back then, here was some clever people who actually had a point by creating these traditions.
Guys let me know what your thoughts are on this topic. Could be interesting to know what your views are – Should we stick to our tradition that was created hundreds of years ago or should we be more scientific and be more realistic?
Until next time
